Different Types of Love: A Detailed Analysis

Different Types of Love

Of Love and Other Good Things

  • Freudian Love: Love intimately connected with sexuality. Freud considered this the basic form of love (for him, friendship was a derivative of erotic love, and benevolence, a transformation of Eros).
  • Christian Love: This concept differs from Eros, emphasizing benevolence and a more natural expression.
  • Caritas (Christian) / Agape (Greek): Characterized by natural generosity and empathy.
  • Love of Friendship (Philia): A Socratic love, where the love of ideals or ideas is paralleled, by analogy, with romantic attraction.
  • Eros: Love as joy, a love that embraces the other and delights in their beauty.
  • Mudita: Joy in the joy of others, distinct from compassionate benevolence, as it does not focus on the suffering of others.
  • Memetics: Analogous to genetics, viewing individuals as means of transmitting genes, similar to how chickens perpetuate eggs.
  • Love Desire: A self-centered love.
  • Maternal Love: Unconditional and nurturing.
  • Transpersonal Love: Love of the ideal or divine; a relationship with the divine.
  • Valorizing Love: Intellectual love.
  • Loving-Kindness: More emotional, with a maternal character.
  • Erotic Love: Instinctive love.

Brain Regions and Love

  • Emotional brain or midbrain (mammalian brain) is associated with loving-kindness.
  • Instinctive brain is associated with Eros.
  • Human cerebrum or neocortex is associated with valorizing love.

Problematic Forms of Love

  • Super-ego: The result of internalized cultural mandates that dictate goodness through compulsory compassion, often accompanied by a threat (e.g., “…and if not, you go to hell”).
  • Parasitic Loves: Loves disguised as deficiencies. These are ways to fill a personal void, attempting to address personal shortcomings with the love of others.
    • People seeking love through sexual or romantic relationships, representing an unrecognized search for love through sex.
    • People seeking protection due to a lack of care, navigating life as if orphaned, seeking missing care and trying to inspire compassion.
    • People seeking respect, not necessarily love in the common sense, but recognition and admiration, dedicating much of their life and energy to being important.

Philosophical and Religious Perspectives

  • Christian Love: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
  • Nietzsche: A great critic of compassion.
  • Midbrain (limbic or emotional brain): The brain of love itself; its virtue is often underdeveloped in human life.
  • Neocortex: Associated with the cerebral cortex, the most recently evolved part of the human brain. It often works in isolation, disconnected from the other two brains.
  • Instinctive Brain (Arquencefalo): The archaic brain.
  • Bodhisattvas: Beings that appear only with spiritual development.
  • Loving-kindness: Related to maternal behavior and the midbrain.
  • Erotic or Instinctive Love: In the Christian world, this has often been a forbidden love, associated with pleasure and not solely related to the instinctive brain.
  • St. Augustine: Theologian and psychologist, prone to feelings of guilt.
  • Benevolent Love: Often forbidden and frowned upon by our culture, similar to erotic love.
  • Asceticism: A spiritual technique rather than a philosophy.
  • Love of Friendship: Related to appreciation, admiration, respect, and ideals.
  • Philia: What one seeks in friendship: acceptance, esteem, respect, admiration, and ultimately, worship.
  • Interested Friends: Those who use each other, where one serves the other.
  • Manipulative Friends: Those who, in the name of friendship, seek to achieve other goals.
  • Worship Love: Perception of the other as divine.
  • Intellectual Brain: The most specifically human brain, but also with archaic origins, such as in the imitation of birds’ sounds.
  • Parasitic Love: Love that is not love, but an addiction.
  • Gurdjieff: Advocated for a balance between the instinctive, emotional, and intellectual brain centers.